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This Is What I Know

This Is What I Know

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MichaelBilottaPhotography


Free Account, Worcester, MA

This Is What I Know

There is a period in most people's lives when they believe they are the smartest person alive - no counsel is heeded, no opinion matters, and no one can possibly have more potential than what they see in themselves. Ourselves, rather. This hubris, this arrogance of youth is within us all and it is a natural, possibly necessary part of life. It propels us forward and upward, it instills within us a courage that may seem reckless in hindsight, but oh it is so effective in defining ourselves.

Naturally this arrogance and egotism must subside over time; nature demands it. There are of course a few among us who carry this hubris with them forever as they come to regard it as a personality trait or an elixir for success. But most of us develop a little humility along the way and temperance is slow to come but does and should arrive as we age. We realize we are not the brightest spark in the universe. We realize that there are others who achieved more. We realize that there is so much more beyond our limited range of experience and knowledge.

It is a hard lesson and a humbling one - but it matters. I was no different. I was impossibly opinionated and stubborn and I knew better than everyone. As middle age descends upon me though, I have modified my sense of importance in the universe to an appropriate level (hopefully) and am more comfortable or at least accepting of those things beyond my scope of ability. I can find pride in what I do, but I know I am not alone in my abilities. I can feel a sense of personal accomplishment but I know there are others ahead as well as behind me on that path. Some will overtake me, some will never be level, some will fall behind.

Humility - that is what this image is about. Personal humility and acceptance of the gifts you have as they are, not as you wish them to be. The person is surrounds by little flowers in a field, partially consumed by the ground. Feeble branches grow from his person, and small amounts of fruit lay before him - the fruits of his labor, his art. Over the wall in the distance, grand trees and large industrial towers can be seen as a parallel - the scale is much grander than what he is able to produce, but similar in concept. His branches compared to the towers. The glowing lights of the towers compared to his tiny fruit. The magnificent trees to his little field.

The point is to not look at the distance, at the unattainable - the point is to tend to your own garden, your own gifts. It is a lesson I would like to impart to many I come across in the art community, in creative photography, but, nature being nature, those lessons will fall on arrogant, deaf ears - just as they should. I would not have listened to me when I was in my teens or twenties, so why would anyone else? Once in awhile I look at the creative output of others and I feel a twinge of jealousy, a faint longing to best them, but then I go back to doing what I do, and try to find the happiness in my own process and my own art.

There is a valuable lesson to be learned, and that is to not worry so much about the achievements and abilities of others. That only leads to jealousy, to competitiveness, to self-loathing. If you see in yourself a spark of potential or ability, you need to cultivate it and focus on it, regardless of the talents of others. Your achievements may never reach the heights others have reached but they will be yours, uniquely yours, and that is worth a lot - at least to yourself. It is a fire that will keep you alight and warm for the rest of your life.

A Before and After version of this image can be seen on my Facebook page at: www.Facebook.com/MichaelBilottaPhotography

Model: Gilberto Mendez

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Camera Canon EOS 5D Mark II
Lens Canon EF 50mm f/1.4 USM
Aperture 11
Exposure time 1/250
Focus length 50.0 mm
ISO 200

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